Enter Larry Norman Hill, 57, the studious-looking individual pictured to the left.
On Sunday, a pizza delivery woman left her 1999 Pontiac Grand Am where it had stalled in rising floodwaters following a severe storm.
Later that night, neighbors witnessed a completely naked Larry Norman Hill hitting the car with what is believed to be a golf club; a gold driver, specifically. He allegedly knocked the side-view mirror off, caved in the roof, ripped a headlight out and opened a door and let the water come pouring into the interior.
One neighbor yelled at 57-year-old Hill, telling him to stop and asking him how he would like it if someone did that to his car, to which he responded that he had laid claim to it and that it was now his.
On Monday, the owner of the vehicle returned to reclaim it, witnessed the damage, and called the sheriff’s office. Responding officers didn’t have to ask too many questions before witnesses came forward tp point the finger at Hill.
Police located Hill, fully clothed and walking on Moog Road, carrying a putter.
The officer questioned Hill about his motives for bashing the Pontiac.
He explained that he was on the roof of the car because he thought that there was a baby inside and he “wanted to save it.”
The police report goes on to state: “I asked him why he opened the doors to the vehicle and he told me he wanted to air it out.”
Hill was charged with criminal mischief. He remained Tuesday at the Pasco jail in lieu of $1,000 bail.